The concept of the Dark Night of the Soul was first written about by 16th Century Spanish Catholic priest, mystic, and a Carmelite friar of converso origin St. John of the Cross. And St. Teresa of Avila wrote of her own harrowing experience extensively in “The Interior Castle.” More recently, author Thomas Moore and others have written about this existential wilderness/spiritual despair rite-of-passage experience.
A true Dark Night of the Soul is a trial like no other. In it’s most acute moments, it can feel like madness. In essence, it is a madness. Albeit, a particular form and flavor—distinct from what’s ordinarily associated with schizophrenia or other unspecified psychosis, which may or may not contain spiritual preoccupations and/or delusions, but is not spiritually inspired/directed in the way a true Dark Night of the Soul is considered to be.
Maddening as it is, on the upside, it becomes a great light as The Divine shatters our attempts to control our own spiritual life— arguably, the central ‘problem’ that this experience aims to address.
But, is it truly a Dark night of the Soul?
leggo my ego
While probably aptly named given the times and context in which St. John and St. Teresa lived and suffered— long before the advent of anything much resembling psychology— the term itself has been declared a misnomer, and re-designated by some as Dark Night of the Ego.
Why ego?
Well, even the original mystics saw the phenomenon as an attempt by the Divine to break through our self-imposed suffering/darkness via the shackles of the control-hungry lower self (arguably synonymous with the more modern conception of ego) to let the light of Higher Self/Truth shine through, first bringing us to our proverbial or literal knees to elicit a thorough surrender, and thus, initiate our highest union with God.
I both agree and disagree with the reframe. And this is reasonable and reconcilable in my view as we’re in the land of paradox whenever we attempt to codify mystical or spiritual experiences containing largely ineffable phenomena that words often fail to capture. And in which the ‘truth’ of what’s being experienced is both highly subjective and very often a quantum both/and rather than this /or/ that.
The part of me that agrees with the Dark Night of the Ego conception is the part of me that believes to my core that our soul, as it were, is fine. No matter what. Always fine. Here I’m meaning the soul as synonymous with our spirit, our Higher Self or Larger Self, and even inextricably linked to the Oversoul and/or Cosmic Consciousness.
In Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, the multiplicity of mind-oriented model that’s the primordial roux of my view of the psyche, and well as the fundamental premise of my Subconscious Heal and Release® Energy Psychology process, this multiplicity, or polypsychism, is the implicit operating assumption.
IFS views the Larger Self (or just Self) the enduring, eternal, undamaged core of who we are, despite even the most devastating trauma or pain we may have endured. In this model, ‘parts” of us—subpersonalities— hold the pain, manage and protect the pain, as distinct from Self. Parts can become polarized, perform extreme functions, and become highly disharmonized with each other. But the Self remains pure and whole as it always was.
So from this standpoint, even amidst the deepest well of darkness, the soul, spirit, or Larger Self, remains perfectly intact.
The part of me that wants to disagree with the reframe is the part that respects the ancient mystics and sees reverence in the original designation that flowed from such intense spiritual despair, forsakenness and suffering as being essentially a battle for our soul and triumph over lower nature, ego, and/or what dark forces may archetypally, generationally/ancestrally, culturally or even interdimensionally conspire to shroud us in the darkness, ever-far from the Light of The Divine-based “leveling up” that our soul/spirit yearns for.
What’s more, when the Dark Night enters, all of us is effected. All of us is involved, one way or another. Our soul, our Larger Self may in fact, be fine. But it’s not separate from the rest, so it must be, in some way, going through it with us.
In the end, as with everything in the realm of the Mysterium Tremendum, such distinctions are probably ultimately meaningless. So there’s that :>
spiritual Emergency
Worth mentioning is the related experience of what in the 80’s was termed Spiritual Emergency by the pioneering transpersonal psychiatrist Stanislov Grof. A more modern conception, spiritual emergency is in some sense the inversion of a Dark Night, as it’s a psycho-spiritual phenomenon that usually begins with an energetic upsurge, with or without kundalini activation, or what’s been termed “transpersonal elation.” There’s a sense of energy center activation, expansion, heightened perception and spiritual vision or understanding that can be as pleasant as a bi-polar manic phase, and just as dangerous if experienced in the absence of discernment, solid navigation skills, and grounding. Darkness can and usually does enter the fold, but that often comes mid-way or later through the process when the “emergency” portion begins to give way to “emergence.” (If and when it doesn’t, it may be an indication of more mental health/psychological crisis than psycho-spiritual emergence. But that’s a whole ‘nother post).
There are some modern spiritual teachers who liken spiritual emergencies to nothing more than “the ego throwing a tantrum.” That may be itself, ironically, an ego-based perspective. Because, who can truly know what another’s experience is or is not? Whether this definition is received as dismissive, humorous, partially or fully accurate, or a total unappreciation or misunderstanding of complicated dynamics, that’s up to each us to determine, I suppose. I think there’s something to this characterization, a grain of truth perhaps. Certainly there’s value in considering the ways in which the egoic mind can become rather tenacious when it senses an emerging loss of control. But it’s a rather narrow definition, at least. Hard to argue that.
my own rodeo
As I’ve shared about here and discussed at length on some podcasts which can be found here, my own whirlwind Dark Night was a fucking doozy. Looking back, I can relate to the ego tantrum aspect. My ego attempted to steer me way wrong, for sure. Away from that which would see the journey through in the best and healthiest of ways. In other phases, it felt like my soul was fracturing; hanging on for dear life as pain raged forth and inexplicable confusion and despair took over.
Yet deep down, all the while there was a knowing that my essence—call it soul, spirit, Higher or Larger Self, was actually fine; that there was a multi-level breaking down and restructuring was taking place, akin to the ‘psychic dismemberment’ experience that’s part and parcel of the so-called shamanic illness.
Surrendering and supplicating daily, meditating through the pain, taking insanely long walks in the woods and many other supports carried me through. Ultimately, direct intervention from palpable spiritual forces came to answer my call. Darkness slowly evaporated. Hope, intense gratitude and an entirely new leg of the journey began. One, in my case, was marked by the receiving of unexpected spiritual gifts (claircognizance/clairsentience), regular communion with various multidimensional energies, masters, saints, sages and collectives, and other awe-inspiring unfoldings. Many of which are still, years later, in progress.
To what end, I truly don’t yet know. I may never. But my faith has never been stronger.
There are universal and idiosyncratic personal elements to every crisis, including the Dark Night. (“That which is most personal is most universal”). There are the aspects, usually on the mood dysregulation/emotional/mental health level that everyone who finds themselves in this particular wilderness will encounter. Yet we all go through these waves our own way, too. We respond from our own conditioning, our past trauma, from our innate resilience level, our character structure and level of spiritual advancement at the time. Then there are the uniquely personal elements of the spiritual/existential portion of the crisis/rite of passage that’s as unpredictable as varied as anything.
One thing I know, from professional and personal experience, is that any darkness, including that which qualifies as a Dark Night, responds well to consistent, fervent prayer/affirmations/decrees, faith, patience, trust, hope, community and qualified professional support.
It takes a village, which often necessitates the guidance of an experienced professional to get through it and integrate it properly. This is specifically what I offer via Spiritual Support through the psycho-spiritual assessment, exploration and integration specialty I call Support for Extraordinary Experience® (SEE).
Assistance is available
If you or someone you know is experiencing a spiritual or spiritually-themed existential crisis, spiritual emergency/emergence process or bona fide Dark Night, I have years of experience seeing people through the rough waters, recognizing and integrating the often remarkable gifts that flow from successful navigation. I’m a member of the Association for Spiritual Integrity, the American Center for the Integration of Spiritually Transformative Experiences and other professional organizations and communities that exist to help support people through the entire range of mystical, non-ordinary or otherwise potentially spiritually transformative experiences.
If you’re looking for a spiritually aware and qualified Nashville Therapist or Therapist in Franklin TN, visit me at: Therapy Outside the Box or email me at chris@therapyoutsidethebox.com or call me at 615.430.2778.
I’m also available for consultation the world over virtually via Telehealth/Video.
If we are “aligned” according to spirit/my higher guidance to do so, it would be my honor to assist you!
PAX,
Chris Hancock, LCSW, ACMHP
Franklin, TN