This was sent to me by someone who recently started the work with me. This is this person’s detailed recollection of our most recent session. Only the third. Too long for an IG post, so here it is. To me it’s a clear illustration of the role Higher Sources (Illumined Ones, Supreme Beings, Archangels, etc) can and do play in the work when invoked/invited in with fearlessness, reverence, awe and gratitude.
Graciously offered with permission to share:
Goddess Sophia (Faith/Wisdom), associated with the Gnostic tradition, thought of by some as a 'code' or frequency, is widely considered the Creatrix; Divine Feminine embodiment of The Godhead. Her energy, or part of it anyway, is one of many who answer the call in both my Transpersonal-IFS and Multidimensional Divine Light Transmission (MDLT) modalities.
“Before we begin I mention to Chris that I feel as if I am in a sort of waiting stage, like almost as if I’m in the Birth canal and I know I can’t go back, but I’m afraid to go through, something is holding me back.
So then, I settle in and immediately feel Goddess Sophia. Chris confirms, yes.
Warmth, comfort, safety.
I am then instantly greeted with a lot of energy, many voices wanting to be heard. It’s a bit overwhelming, and I recognize them as parts of myself from different ages. Chris gently suggests inviting them all to sit in circle council style with me. They are happy to oblige.
I instantly feel I’m at the ocean. We are all seated on the beach in circle. There are so many versions of m there, all seated together. There is a bonfire of sorts in the middle, and a talking stick. I introduce myself, as I am now, in present time. I let everyone know that I am open and willing to hear and receive everything that wants to be spoken. A 3 year old part of myself instantly makes it clear to me she wants to help lead and comes and sits in my lap.
As this happens, another 3 year old part says she’s scared and is trying to distract. Chris gently suggests I invite her to sit with Sophia. She 100% agrees and climbs in Sophia’s lap, while Sophia is also wrapped around us all holding us in circle. It is peaceful.
I ask who would like to speak first and the 3 yo talks. “I want you to know that I know what I’m talking about, and that my feelings were real and true about everything that was happening.” I nod and tell her I understand.
Next a teenage part of myself stands up. She is 14-16. She’s PISSED. “I just want to scream.” So, I say, ok, scream. She screams and stomps and yells and talks about how lonely and exhausted she is. She talks about how all she wanted was to connect and be heard and loved for who she is. She’s tired of lying, but she lied to protect herself. I told her I completely understand. She then says that she wants space to go and listen to whatever music she wants to.
Chris gently guides that I tell her absolutely, but would she like to give that pain to anything first? She says yes, the water. Then at once EVERYONE says they want to give all theirs to the water too! They feel that same loneliness and exhaustion. So I say, yes. I understand. Then they all stand up and RUN into the ocean. Diving, floating, swimming, giving it all to mama ocean.
I look and see there is one part of me that hasn’t joined them. She is 6-8 years old. She says, “I’m not worthy of that. I’m not worthy of that joy and release. No one can understand what I’m feeling and who I am.” I tell her that I understand, because I do.
Chris empathizes and suggests I ask Sophia to come close, and she does.
That 6-8 y/o part of me softens. I notice she has a sort of costume on, and I ask her if she wants to take off what she’s carrying because it doesn’t belong to her. She says she really does because it’s so heavy. I tell her that she can reach down and start at her feet and just unzip. She does. She takes off what feels like a layer of thick skin. She wants to throw it in the fire. And she CHUNKS ITS. Underneath it all she is lighter. She is smiling. She runs and joins everyone in the ocean.
Present time me watches these parts in the ocean enjoying themselves, like really enjoying. Laughing, playing, and enjoying the innocence and ease of being who they are. Free to be kids.
I feel into Sophia. I feel her warmth and love, and thank her for holding the space for all of me. I thank her for always being there for me whether I was aware of it or not. As we are getting close to ending the session, Chris asks if these parts would love to stay in the ocean scene together, and we can enclose them in a beautiful gold bubble, or if they would like to merge with me.
Then I feel the answer to his question...
They want to merge. They trust me, but before I go through this birth canal I spoke of, I’ll need to come back, retrieve these parts and take them with me. They’re ready to move through with me. No longer will I abandon myself! They ask me to please visit with them regularly through meditation and silence, to take time to slow down and be with them. Find stillness with all these parts of me because they have so much wisdom.
Blessed be, so it is.”
-S.C., Oklahoma City, OK